“Well it’s not normal” aka I have no clothes without metal on them

I don’t know if I posted an update to my foot drama on Wednesday and I’m too lazy to go look so a recap.

Went to the dr.

He said “oh it’s been three weeks and it hasn’t gotten better?  You need an MRI.”

:sidenote- why couldn’t he have sent me for the MRI before the new year/new deductible?:

I said “okay”

I left.

Riveting appointment.  We did discuss worst case scenarios and where do we from here but that was pretty much the gist of it.

So last night I look over the form for the diagnostic place and realize that I need to wear clothes that have no metal in/on them.  This was a much more difficult task then I realized.  Bra- underwire.  First sportsbra- metal clasp.  Second sportsbra- good to go (for all those big chested chicks out there- check out Moving Comfort.  Best sports bras I’ve found, bar none).

Pants- I’ve got numerous pairs of those gym pants with the zippers on the side.  It wasn’t until like an hour later that I realized the zippers were metal.  Cluebird.  So then I figured I’d wear shorts.  But I didn’t want to wear pants over them.  And what if it was cold in the room and I’m lying there in a pair of shorts freezing my ass off?  And then I realized that every pair of shorts I have has metal eyelets for the string.  What the hell.  So then I found my yoga (they really should be called, warm and comfortable lounge around the house pants because these pants have never seen a yoga) pants.  Score.  No metal.  Well then there was the underwear issue.  I didn’t want to go without underwear because what if I got there and they wanted me to wear a gown and then holy shit I have no underwear on and I’m walking around the office with my ass hanging out.  But the pants are really designed to be worn without underwear so if I go anywhere afterwards I’m going to look like an idiot with my really obvious underwear lines.

Have I mentioned that I tend to overthink things at times?

In the end I went with the yoga pants with the underwear.  I figured the underwear lines were a much lesser sin than the bare ass.

Sooooo….

I get there this morning and pay my deductible and get settled on the machine and we get that done with.

About an hour later it’s over (if that machine was just a little bit quieter I could have totally taken a nap.  It was warm and the noise is very soothing, in a really loud sort of way).

I ask the dude if he can see anything.

He tells me that  he can’t read the images but he’s seen enough to know that “well it’s not normal.”

No seriously, that’s what he said.

I will rest easy tonight for sure!

As I’m driving to the post office- to subject all those people to my underwear lines- I call my mom and tell her about my not normal foot.  And she can’t resist the opportunity… “Well that goes along with the rest of you.”

Ahhh such loving words.

And this concludes another episode of “Mountain out of a Molehill: The story of IronBunny’s foot injury”

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About Amanda Broyles

Amanda is amazing. Amanda is spectacular. Amanda is humble. Amanda is also a full time college student so take pity on her and don't complain when her TV reviews aren't up immediately following an episode.
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