Or illegal for that matter, because if it wasn’t I’d be famous for sure.

I’d have a room full of trophies and ribbons.

I’d be on the cover of every dog fighting magazine in the world.

I’d be featured often on ESPN the Ocho.

And who would get me to this esteemed status?

Ninja.

Oh my word would she ever.

I wouldn’t have to do much to get her in the fighting mood. I guess in the dog fighting world it isn’t uncommon to abuse, starve, and generally mistreat the dog.

sidenote: Dear FBI that might be possibly monitoring google searches for illegal activity- I am googling “training a dog for dog fighting” merely from a research standpoint. I have no intention of actually starting a dog fighting ring no matter how much fame and glory it might bring me.

I wouldn’t have to do any of that.

All it would take is to throw a piece of paper in the ring.

I take that back. All it would take is to throw a piece of paper in the ring and let the other dog start to play with it. Then Ninja would pitch a fit and decide that she not only wants the piece of paper, she NEEDS the piece of paper. Once that happens, it’s on.

How do I know this?

Because Ginger is at the vet right now because she had the audacity to be chewing on a piece of paper she snagged from under the couch.

See Ginger has this thing for paper. I don’t know when, where, how or why but she does. Paper towels, receipts, paper scraps- it doesn’t matter, she loves them all. She will sit and play with a piece of paper for an hour. It’s ridiculous.

Problem is she is fiercely protective of this damn piece of paper and don’t even think of taking it away from her.

Enter Ninja who subscribes fully to the theory that what ever is hers is hers and whatever is yours is also hers. Combine this lovely outlook with her being in the throes of the obnoxious and very trying “puppy adolescence” and it can get ugly fast.

Nine times out of ten Ginger either gives up or tells Ninja where she can stick it and there is no bloodshed.

Of course that tenth time is what sends man and/or beast to the doctor or vet.

Ginger is currently sitting on the bed looking pitiful trying to milk every bit of sympathy from her three little puncture wounds. I’ll give it to her today but tomorrow? Buck up littler camper, it’s not going to kill you.

Of course I do need to give a shout out to the fabulous doctors and staff at our vets office. They have been very good to me and my dogs (and my imaginary husband) and don’t bat an eye when I come in time and time again with yet another injured dog. I’m very appreciative that I’ve found a place that I feel comfortable taking my dogs knowing that they’ll receive great care and attention- Thanks guys!

(KEVIN: you can put their name in here, it’s the one next door to the library down the street from BHB’s favorite spot)

Moral of the story- dog fighting is horrible but now I feel the need to find another activity in which Ninja the Terror can get me rich and famous because the idea has been planted and I’m sort of liking it.

Dear TLC: I would like to suggest an idea for a show- “Cute dogs doing bad things”. You could air it right after “Toddlers and Tiaras”. Can we say goldmine? I think so. I’ll have my people call your people.