Where the hell have I been?

It’s been awhile!

I’ve actually been busy.

I went home to visit the family.  Spent an epic evening with my best friend- had one too many Tom Collins while smoking my lungs to dust and once again busting out into a drunken rendition of Midnight Train to Georgia.  To quote the bff, “Anytime your dad has to enlist your mother’s church friends to drive you home- you know it was a stellar night.”  That is was indeed.

Went to a Cardinals game with my brother.  An awesome Cardinals game.  A bright spot in their otherwise abysmal performance of late.  Seriously how do you blow a nine (six?) run lead in the ninth inning?  HOW?!?!?!?!

le sigh

Anyways, yea.

Before that we spent a weekend over in Savannah.  It was lovely.  Except for a moment in a store where I saw a glimpse into the future that involved myself being arrested for assault and battery.

So I’m in this store and I was looking for something for my sister’s kid.  I had found this cute little shortall thing that had a crab on it.  I figured this kid is going to be decked out to the hilt in pink so a crab here and there wouldn’t hurt her.  Woman who worked in the shop comes up to me and starts innocently chatting.  She then asked who I was buying for.  When I told her she started down a very dangerous path with

“Do you have kids?  No?  Oh well, let me tell you, this really is for a little boy.”

a.) I hate when people talk to me like I’m an idiot.  I’m perfectly aware that the outfit was intended for a boy.  However comma I also am perfectly aware that this is a toddler we are talking about.  She isn’t going to give a flying rat’s ass that crabs are for boys (hahaha).

b.) It is generally thought to be a bad idea to start a statement with the premise that just because someone doesn’t have children automatically means they are clueless.  Throw in the fact that most infertile people really, really hate that insinuation and this situation was quickly turning into a powder keg.

Well I let her go on about how little girls need to wear dresses (I see her children as having issues as they grow older) and through gritted teeth finally picked one out, paid for it, and got the hell out of there before I lost my cool.

Gah!  Just thinking about it pisses me off all over again.

Moving on.

St. Louis, Savannah, what else?  Oh yea!

I got a job.

It’s a one day a week thing delivering newspapers to gas stations and those box things.  I actually really enjoy it.  Drive around listening to the radio and meeting some really different characters?  Sign me up!

But that is another post for another day.  It’s late and I’m tired.

So until then- only 57 (right?) days until the return of Alabama football.  Whoohooo!!!!


About Amanda Broyles

Amanda is amazing. Amanda is spectacular. Amanda is humble. Amanda is also a full time college student so take pity on her and don't complain when her TV reviews aren't up immediately following an episode.
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1 Response to Where the hell have I been?

  1. Kelly B says:

    Missed you. 🙂

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